Double binds are contradictory messages that come from our family and our usually unconscious. It doesn't matter what a person does they can't get it right. If you give in to a family member out of a sense of duty, they will be happy but you won't. If you protect yourself and don't give in, you risk being kicked out of the family. This fear comes from a deep need for survival and as children, we can't live without our family. This video helps explain this concept.